WEBVTT
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The quantum girly.
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We didn't quantum girly.
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Yes.
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Yes.
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I wanna I wanna coin ferret girly, which was we were talking anything about before.
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Oh my god, yeah.
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Because I'm like, you've heard of horse girls.
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Have you heard of ferret girls?
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I am a ferret girl.
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Welcome to ferret girl psychology.
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We're a ferret girl.
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My inner child just jizzed.
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Psychology.
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Hot girl psychology.
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Welcome to Hot Girl Psychology.
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We're a Girls Girl podcast where attractiveness meets attachment wounds.
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Here at Hot Girl Psychology, we believe that the darkest parts of your mind are the sexiest.
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I'm Emily.
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I'm a startup founder and CEO, and I put the psycho in psychonutritionist.
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And I'm Deanna.
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I'm a clinical psychotherapist, public dark romance author, and recovering people pleaser.
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I treat trauma by day and I live it by night.
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What's up, girlies?
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Self-care is so oversaturated, but it's so important.
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It's literally the most important thing.
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And I I talk about it with I talk about self-care.
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I also talk about balance all the time with clients of being, you know, there are a lot of clients that don't want to self-care because they don't want to be lazy and they want to be able to achieve their dreams and work towards goals and succeed in all of those things.
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Um, but then there is that balance with self-care and not just the self-care that is um objectively good for you because uh things like things like meditating, things like eating healthy, things like showering, you know, these are things that are objectively good for us.
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We do them.
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We also like kind of need to do them.
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Yes.
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Um, and then there are things of just pure enjoyment.
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That's also really important.
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Absolutely.
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Yeah.
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What do you consider to be pure enjoyment for yourself?
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So you said like reading a book in the park.
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Yes, reading a book in the park.
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I I love being outside.
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I love being in nature.
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Um and going on walks is a big one, which you know, it's exercise.
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And so it's good for you, but I do genuinely like it.
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Yeah.
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Um, because sometimes we have those self-care things that like aren't enjoyable at first or they're not very appealing, and then we do them and then we feel great.
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I genuinely love to walk and I collect rocks.
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That's why I was just talking about how I'm I am a rock girl.
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The rock girl.
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Rock girly.
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Um, because I I collect them and then I paint them.
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My god, you're like a you're you could be like a little penguin and give all your pebbles to yes, yes.
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Okay, so I do that.
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So whenever, whenever uh otters too, they collect rocks and then they have this little pouch in like their stomach that they put them in and just like keep them and just swim around with rocks all day.
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That's so cute.
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I love so fun.
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I know I love otters.
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Um I'm also otter girl.
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I mean, everyone's otter girl.
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You're not like you're you're a psycho, don't talk to me.
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Um but uh uh yeah, I whenever Jake and I go on walks, I always want to collect every rock that I see, but then they're like too heavy for me to walk with.
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So he always just carries all my rocks for me.
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We'll we'll go back and he has like 40 pounds of rocks in his arms.
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Wow.
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Um it's like he lives to serve.
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Yes, but uh what about you?
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What are things that feel just completely enjoyable and like pure and utter peace for you?
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I really like um I like getting eight hours of sleep.
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Yes, as much as humanly possible.
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Um, I love just yapping.
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I mean, literally this podcast, like it's it's just a hobby.
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Yeah.
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Just chatting about, you know, like it's a little directed, but it's still a hobby.
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I love going out to eat.
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I love you.
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I fucking love it.
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Because you're such a foodie.
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I'm such a foodie.
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Yeah, I know.
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I'm obsessed with good food.
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I'm obsessed with like like good food and interesting food.
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Um, so I love to go out to eat.
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I I eat like a fucking founder.
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I I just maximize my, well, one, maximizing my consciousness.
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Um, and two, maximizing my cod cognition, and three, maximizing my health.
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And that's it.
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And I don't really care unless I'm going out to eat, which is why I love going out to eat.
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Sounds like more mindful eating than a diet.
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Yeah, it is.
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Yeah, it is.
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It's also just like just here's how I can get the most out of my diet without having to think too hard about it.
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Yeah.
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Um yeah, it's definitely not a diet at all, but it's I would call it the founder diet.
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It's like a founder lifestyle diet.
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When you said a founder diet, I I forgot that you're talking about being like the founder of a company.
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I was thinking of like a founding father.
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Founding a founding father of like like a colonial, like a colonial man.
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I'm like, is it because you eat standing up?
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Loki I do though.
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Um I used to have I I am a founding father.
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I used to have a uh my license plate for a really long time said I'm daddy.
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Of course.
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Yeah, it was just like a power thing.
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It was like a like I'm I run this shit kind of thing.
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Because I do.
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Yeah.
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Yeah.
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I drive a fast little why ha why hide it?
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No, never, never ever.
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I run this shit.
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So yeah, and other things that I like to do.
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Um, I love to travel and I love to be pretty.
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So I invest a lot of time in being pretty.
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Um, because it just makes me happy to look at myself and think, oh, I did that.
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How nice.
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Yeah.
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Um I just I love like socializing.
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Yeah.
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And shopping.
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So are you more of an extrovert?
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Sorry.
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An extrovert than an introvert.
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Yes, a little bit of both, but primarily extroverted.
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Yeah.
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Yeah.
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I I was talking to somebody about this recently.
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It was a couple, actually.
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Um, you know, one's an one partner is an introvert, one per partner is an extrovert, and a lot of times you'll see that in couples and they can't really understand each other.
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And at least to me, what I define introvert versus extroverted as is an introvert, it doesn't mean that they don't like to socialize, but socializing depletes their energy.
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Yes.
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Yeah.
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And then an extrovert, socializing gives them energy.
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For me, because I consider myself an introvert, not meaningful conversation is what drains my battery.
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I hate small talk.
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I'm not good at it.
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I I don't do that.
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Um, and and there are some times that I'll have friends that apologize to me and they're just like, I'm sorry that you had to be my therapist tonight because I was talking about X, Y, and Z.
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And I was like, no, I would rather talk about this than talk about fucking nothing.
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Yeah.
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Or talk about the weather or anything like that.
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Just like what you've had going on this week.
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Yeah.
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Yeah.
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Yeah.
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And if if I didn't want to play therapist, I wouldn't.
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Yeah.
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So nobody ever needs to apologize for for that for me.
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Or if I did it and then was upset about it, it's my fault.
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Yeah.
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That's real.
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Because I'm yeah, I I'm in complete control of that.
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And I have been guilty of that, of just like going home feeling really, really depleted after hanging out with somebody.
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I was like, I didn't need to do that.
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I I could have redirected the conversation.
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I didn't need to, you know, I I didn't need to step into that role.
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It was a choice.
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Yes.
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You know, I love that.
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Yeah.
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Ooh.
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And agency is so hot.
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Yes.
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And then you gotta take accountability for if you go home, you leave a social situation feeling bad, you do need to kind of say, like, what did I do?
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What boundaries did I allow somebody to cross?
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Or what like doors did I open that I didn't want to open?
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You know, absolutely because most people don't know your boundaries.
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So how do they know if they're crossing them if you don't make them clear?
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That is so true.
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Yeah.
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Yeah.
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I feel like my boundaries are like unequivocally clear all the time because I learned very quickly that if you don't put up boundaries, uh, they will be found.
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They will be, they will be located real fucking fast.
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Same thing with like clients.
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Like I have extraordinary boundaries with my clients um because I just can't, I just don't have the capacity to not have boundaries.
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Like I know that I have very, very um I allocate my resources like a budget, you know, like my emotional and cognitive resources.
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And um if I don't have space for it, then I don't really have space for it.
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And that's like good.
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So I don't really let people kind of like unless I don't know.
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I guess historically some partners have kind of taken some extra resources from me.
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Yeah.
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But outside of that, well, that's how you learn what your boundaries are.
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You most of our boundaries that we have, we learn the hard way.
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Yeah, that is so true.
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Yeah, because like why would you need them otherwise, right?
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Right.
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How would you even know that they exist?
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Right.
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And somebody when somebody tries to give you unsolicited advice, usually it's coming from like that good place of being like, Hey, I don't want you to make this mistake.
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You should put up a boundary, or you know, but yeah, you you're not gonna listen to them.
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Yeah, you have to learn the hard way.
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It's pretty bad.
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Yeah, it can be pretty bad.
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Yeah, yeah, absolutely.
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Yeah, yeah.
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Um, I love that.
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Yeah, I love that.
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Um, also, so for everybody, in case you haven't caught on, Emily and I's catchphrase is I love that.
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In our first episode, we didn't mean to, but it was about like 40 times that we collectively said, I love that.
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I love that.
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Yeah, like so much.
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So that's just our thing.
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And one day when we do merch, I think we should have yeah, yeah, no, vegetables.
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Absolutely.
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It's the new that's hot.
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Yes, that's what I think of Paris Hilton.
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No, like yeah, we're like Paris Hilton.
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Like literally, we are dark Paris and Nicole.
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Like, actually.
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Oh my gosh.
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Yeah, like I love that secret.
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I love that.
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I love that.
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I love that.
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We're not gonna say who's who because obviously we both want to be Paris.
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So I swear to God, man.
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Paris Hilton and like Kim Kardashian ran so that women like me could fucking walk.
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Yeah, like for real.
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Yeah, and I can't believe I like I just am so blown away by how like these women with like money and beauty just fucking conquered so hard.
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Yeah, so smart.
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Yeah, brilliant.
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They they really are, they're brilliant.
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They also got into a market and did something different.
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Yes, even though they might not be traditionally seen as geniuses, they are.
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Yeah, they are fucking brilliant.
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They played the game better than the rest of you motherfuckers.
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So fucking literally.
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They all did.
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No, literally, and like all they had to do to start like when I say that they ran so we could walk, what I really mean by that is like they released like sex tapes to get themselves out there and then just did fucking quiet, brilliant shit afterwards.
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They got the publicity, they made themselves look stupid, they made themselves look like just like vapid and like you know, just plastic and whatever.
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And then in the background, they're like building a fucking empire.
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Like it's insane.
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So then it's still fucking working.
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In other words, they died for our sins.
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They literally did.
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They literally, they are the mythical archetypes.
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Okay.
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So our topic for today is hot girl archetypes.
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Part two.
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Part two.
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Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
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Yeah.
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I'm excited.
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So for those who are listening, hot girl archetypes are based on the concept of like Jungian archetypes, so Carl Jun.
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Um, and they are just essentially parts and pieces of us that are able to persist throughout generations.
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So they are something that the common humanity shares, the common collective unconscious, um, and it's like the little parts of us that come out across humanity.
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So we developed the concept of hot girl archetypes, which is part of the hot girl psychology index.
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And it uh we're releasing them every once in a while.
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Yeah.
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Yes.
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So hot girl archetypes, we did come up with it.
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It is a phrase that we coined.
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We did.
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Why I love that.
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In case you were confused.
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Um JK.
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Yes.
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Nobody would ever be confused about us.
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Yeah.
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I they they are based on Carl Jung's archetypes.
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So they're innate structures and behaviors that all humans have.
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It's the collective unconscious, and it which is a deep layer of the psyche that all humans share.
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And so these archetypes, they're universal patterns, but I also like to think of them as characters.
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Yeah.
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Almost.
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They're like almost mythical.
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Yes, right.
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So like the the archetypes that you probably know the most of, like the of Carl Jung would be like the divine feminine and the divine masculine.
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Those are common ones that we think about.
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Yes.
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The animus, which is like the more kind of animalistic side of us.
00:13:02.879 --> 00:13:14.480
Um, the magician, which is kind of like the person who's like making things happen, the alchemist, person who turns their pain into beauty in some way, pain into meaning.
00:13:14.720 --> 00:13:18.320
Um, but we all do these things in different times of our lives.
00:13:18.480 --> 00:13:20.639
We all embody these at different times of our lives.
00:13:20.799 --> 00:13:23.039
So we wear them, kind of, you know.
00:13:23.360 --> 00:13:24.799
It's like wearing somebody's skin.
00:13:25.039 --> 00:13:26.799
It it really is like wearing somebody's skin.
00:13:26.879 --> 00:13:28.320
And your ancestor's skin.
00:13:28.720 --> 00:13:36.080
To be honest, I honestly feel like archetypes are just trauma responses in costume.
00:13:36.480 --> 00:13:38.240
Beautiful way to put it.
00:13:38.399 --> 00:13:39.759
I love I actually love that.
00:13:39.919 --> 00:13:40.879
I'm gonna write that down.
00:13:41.200 --> 00:13:55.360
So they're roles that we play based on our trauma, our fears, um, just being human in general, and they are a coping mechanism.
00:13:55.519 --> 00:13:55.759
Yeah.
00:13:56.000 --> 00:13:57.759
That is why we wear these skins.
00:13:58.000 --> 00:14:01.600
Yeah, yes, it's like it's a coping mechanism to wear someone else's skin.
00:14:01.840 --> 00:14:02.480
Yeah, for sure.
00:14:02.799 --> 00:14:03.519
Write that down.
00:14:04.639 --> 00:14:10.159
Um, but yeah, so there are so many different archetypes.
00:14:10.320 --> 00:14:16.000
And so Carl Jung, he had 12, I guess, basic archetypes.
00:14:16.159 --> 00:14:16.320
Yeah.
00:14:16.720 --> 00:14:22.799
Um, but his whole thing was, you know, you can create your own archetypes, which is pretty much what we're doing.
00:14:23.039 --> 00:14:23.840
That's precisely what we're doing.
00:14:24.000 --> 00:14:28.399
Um, and so you so other like the caregiver, the creator, the orphan.
00:14:28.480 --> 00:14:33.200
I think we talked a little bit about the hero, um, the explorer.
00:14:33.600 --> 00:14:43.039
All of these are parts of the collective unconscious, and they are almost characters that you play roles that you step into.
00:14:43.360 --> 00:14:47.600
And so, hawk girl archetypes, it's a similar concept.
00:14:47.759 --> 00:15:00.720
They are characters that we embody at certain periods of our lives as a way to deal with trauma, with fear, or even just being a woman in this world.
00:15:00.879 --> 00:15:06.559
Yeah, and so they are youngin' archetypes, but make them hot.
00:15:06.720 --> 00:15:07.120
Yes.
00:15:07.360 --> 00:15:13.759
Because there also is just such a host of complexity that comes with being a hot girl.
00:15:14.000 --> 00:15:15.120
It really, really does.
00:15:15.279 --> 00:15:21.360
And so our previous episode, we touched on the cool girl, the siren, the queen.
00:15:21.679 --> 00:15:22.240
Yes.
00:15:22.720 --> 00:15:30.639
Yeah, the lover girl we talked about, femme fatal, the nurturer, the emo girl.
00:15:31.039 --> 00:15:32.879
I think I think that's about it.
00:15:33.039 --> 00:15:33.279
Yeah.
00:15:33.519 --> 00:15:50.799
But we we talk about what these archetypes are kind of stereotypically, like what they are on the surface, what they seem to be, and then we get into the deeper of it all, the shadow of it all, and we say what they actually are, maybe what they want, what they fear.
00:15:50.960 --> 00:15:51.279
Yes.
00:15:51.519 --> 00:15:55.919
We talk about how they're fetishized often by men by the media.
00:15:56.240 --> 00:15:56.639
Absolutely.
00:15:57.120 --> 00:16:12.399
And then we tell you kind of how you can be a more evolved version of this and an empowered version of this because we also talked about how some of these archetypes are more primal than others, and some are more evolved than others.
00:16:12.480 --> 00:16:16.080
Yes, but each one has the potential to be great.
00:16:16.240 --> 00:16:16.480
Absolutely.
00:16:16.720 --> 00:16:18.559
And none of these are good or bad.
00:16:18.720 --> 00:16:18.960
Nope.
00:16:19.120 --> 00:16:20.879
None of these archetypes are good or bad.
00:16:21.039 --> 00:16:25.039
They're not meant to put you in a box at all.
00:16:25.360 --> 00:16:37.360
All they are meant to do is help you understand yourself and understand why you might embody different personas at specific times in your life.
00:16:37.440 --> 00:16:37.919
Yeah.
00:16:38.320 --> 00:16:50.000
And what coping mechanism that is, and also how we pretty much share the same traumas and therefore share the same coping mechanisms.
00:16:50.240 --> 00:16:50.720
Absolutely.
00:16:51.120 --> 00:16:52.000
Absolutely.
00:16:52.240 --> 00:16:52.559
Yeah.
00:16:52.720 --> 00:16:52.960
Yeah.
00:16:53.120 --> 00:16:53.360
Yeah.
00:16:53.440 --> 00:17:02.080
It's the the hot girl archetypes are really interesting because they everyone does them at least once, all of them.
00:17:02.240 --> 00:17:16.960
Like there's little periods and pockets of time in your life or bigger periods of your life that you embody like well, for example, the queen or the siren or the um the cool girl or the lover girl, or it's things like that.
00:17:17.279 --> 00:17:20.319
So those were the first six that we came up with.
00:17:20.480 --> 00:17:23.920
Um, and we have six more for you today.
00:17:24.799 --> 00:17:27.039
So Deanna, would you like to start?
00:17:27.279 --> 00:17:28.160
Yeah, I can start.
00:17:28.400 --> 00:17:28.720
Okay.
00:17:29.039 --> 00:17:29.359
Okay.
00:17:29.920 --> 00:17:35.440
So my first one is the basic girl.
00:17:35.839 --> 00:17:37.200
The basic girl.
00:17:37.519 --> 00:17:38.400
We all know her.
00:17:38.640 --> 00:17:39.119
We do.
00:17:39.359 --> 00:17:40.240
We all know her.
00:17:40.480 --> 00:17:44.319
She has so many different stereotypes.
00:17:44.480 --> 00:17:44.720
Yeah.
00:17:45.119 --> 00:17:50.960
And I actually feel like this archetype changes forms throughout the years.
00:17:51.119 --> 00:17:54.720
And because she very much is what's popular, is what's trendy.
00:17:54.799 --> 00:17:55.039
Yeah.
00:17:55.200 --> 00:17:56.000
And that looks different.
00:17:56.079 --> 00:18:00.400
So basic girl in the 50s looks very different from basic girl today.
00:18:00.559 --> 00:18:00.720
Yeah.
00:18:00.960 --> 00:18:05.039
Even basic girl in 2018 looks very different from basic girl today.
00:18:05.200 --> 00:18:05.519
Yeah.
00:18:05.759 --> 00:18:13.920
But so to me, current basic girl, the stereotype of her is like she wears Lululemon.
00:18:14.079 --> 00:18:14.319
Yeah.
00:18:14.559 --> 00:18:17.039
She likes her pumpkin spice.
00:18:17.440 --> 00:18:17.839
Absolutely.
00:18:18.240 --> 00:18:22.559
She quotes The Office like it's an Orson Wells film.
00:18:23.279 --> 00:18:27.119
She makes loving dogs her whole personality.
00:18:27.839 --> 00:18:29.200
She loves TikTok.
00:18:29.359 --> 00:18:30.720
She loves trends.
00:18:30.960 --> 00:18:33.039
She follows anything that's popular.
00:18:33.680 --> 00:18:34.480
She's a follower.
00:18:34.640 --> 00:18:34.960
Absolutely.
00:18:35.279 --> 00:18:36.160
More than anything else.
00:18:36.319 --> 00:18:41.039
And so she's known to be very surface level.
00:18:41.119 --> 00:18:41.599
Yeah.
00:18:41.920 --> 00:18:45.039
And that she lacks originality.
00:18:45.200 --> 00:18:45.759
Yeah.
00:18:46.079 --> 00:18:50.160
And she doesn't go deep and she doesn't have strong opinions.
00:18:50.319 --> 00:18:52.640
She doesn't have big feelings or strong opinions.
00:18:52.960 --> 00:18:54.559
She doesn't have big feelings or strong opinions.
00:18:55.200 --> 00:19:00.079
Similar to the cool girl in some ways of that kind of self-erasure.
00:19:00.240 --> 00:19:00.559
Yeah.
00:19:01.200 --> 00:19:08.559
And um, but so I think that she's very fetishized, especially by men, because she seems easy.
00:19:08.720 --> 00:19:09.119
Yes.
00:19:09.519 --> 00:19:10.640
She seems simple.
00:19:10.799 --> 00:19:11.119
Yes.
00:19:11.359 --> 00:19:14.480
Or almost like a blank canvas that you can do anything with.
00:19:15.119 --> 00:19:16.880
Which is leaving her really vulnerable.
00:19:17.200 --> 00:19:17.440
Yes.
00:19:17.519 --> 00:19:17.759
Yes.
00:19:18.079 --> 00:19:18.880
She's very vulnerable.
00:19:19.200 --> 00:19:20.240
Yes, exactly.
00:19:20.400 --> 00:19:21.119
Exactly.
00:19:21.440 --> 00:19:27.680
And I think that people like this archetype because it doesn't seem intense.
00:19:27.839 --> 00:19:31.599
It seems lighthearted, you know, nonchalant.
00:19:31.920 --> 00:19:36.559
And because she doesn't have big feelings, maybe people think she doesn't have any feelings.
00:19:36.640 --> 00:19:39.759
And you know, and so or she doesn't show big feelings.
00:19:39.839 --> 00:19:41.200
Everybody has big feelings.
00:19:41.359 --> 00:19:46.319
They're just either tapped into it or they're not, or they're hiding it, or they're not.
00:19:46.799 --> 00:19:51.200
But so the shadow of this archetype.
00:19:51.359 --> 00:19:52.559
So what's really going on?
00:19:53.359 --> 00:19:54.319
One of two things.
00:19:54.559 --> 00:19:54.960
Yes.
00:19:55.200 --> 00:20:04.319
So number one is that basic girl is truly basic in that she has a very underdeveloped self-concept.
00:20:04.799 --> 00:20:05.279
Ooh.
00:20:06.000 --> 00:20:13.440
And uh she has a deep fear of darkness, yeah, so she keeps it on the surface.
00:20:14.000 --> 00:20:14.559
Absolutely.
00:20:14.960 --> 00:20:16.720
So that she doesn't have to go there.
00:20:16.880 --> 00:20:20.799
She doesn't need to feel pain if she keeps it on the surface.
00:20:21.519 --> 00:20:26.559
And I think just being basic is easier for her.
00:20:26.720 --> 00:20:27.039
Yeah.
00:20:27.359 --> 00:20:47.519
Because she doesn't need to confront the dark the darkness, but also not having big feelings, not having strong opinions, uh, makes it a lot less likely for her to get rejected and abandoned, which is what most of us fear at our core.
00:20:48.079 --> 00:20:54.960
So it makes sense why a basic girl would choose to be basic girl and why somebody would choose to embody this.
00:20:55.200 --> 00:21:07.119
But so the second the second shadow of this to me is that on the converse, basic girl is actually not so basic.
00:21:07.599 --> 00:21:07.920
Okay.
00:21:08.400 --> 00:21:13.519
And she is seen as basic because she's actually not seen at all.
00:21:14.559 --> 00:21:22.400
She does have a developed self-concept and she is very interesting, but the people around her are just choosing not to see it.
00:21:22.880 --> 00:21:23.200
Wow.
00:21:23.440 --> 00:21:34.640
And she's surrounded by uh the wrong people, or also maybe she doesn't feel safe to show them these sides of her, these deeper, these more interesting sides of her.
00:21:34.799 --> 00:21:35.119
Yeah.
00:21:35.440 --> 00:21:49.839
And this is something that I that I've realized recently because I do have a client like this who is so cool and so interesting and so uh sweet, and she's she really is just the best.
00:21:49.920 --> 00:21:51.839
And the people around her suck.
00:21:52.559 --> 00:21:54.079
And they don't see it.
00:21:54.880 --> 00:21:58.000
And she's she's just very unseen, unheard.
00:21:58.799 --> 00:22:08.559
So I feel like That's also a possibility for a basic girl, is that she's actually not basic, she's just seen that way because people truly aren't seeing her.
00:22:08.720 --> 00:22:08.880
Right.
00:22:09.279 --> 00:22:20.319
Um, but so if we're talking about an empowered version of this archetype, there is nothing wrong with simplicity.
00:22:20.720 --> 00:22:28.480
There is nothing wrong with following trends, there is nothing wrong with scrolling, there's nothing wrong with liking what you like.
00:22:29.119 --> 00:22:30.880
We all like pumpkin spice.
00:22:31.119 --> 00:22:34.400
We all like we all like the office, we all like dogs.
00:22:34.559 --> 00:22:35.839
They're objectively good things.
00:22:36.000 --> 00:22:38.640
Just because they're popular doesn't make them bad.
00:22:38.880 --> 00:22:40.240
You're allowed to like what you like.
00:22:40.400 --> 00:22:44.960
That being said, make sure that you develop a self-concept.
00:22:45.119 --> 00:22:45.519
Yeah.
00:22:45.839 --> 00:22:57.279
And live according to your genuine likes and your values and prioritize that versus just what's popular.
00:22:57.839 --> 00:22:58.480
Yeah.
00:22:59.279 --> 00:22:59.680
Yeah.
00:22:59.839 --> 00:23:00.480
I love that.
00:23:00.640 --> 00:23:00.960
You know?
00:23:01.119 --> 00:23:01.359
Yeah.
00:23:01.519 --> 00:23:03.440
So and find out what makes you unique.
00:23:03.599 --> 00:23:07.200
Most of us do have things that make us unique and we just haven't explored it.
00:23:07.279 --> 00:23:08.319
We haven't tapped into it.
00:23:08.480 --> 00:23:08.720
Yes.
00:23:08.960 --> 00:23:11.599
And that's the self-concept piece of it.
00:23:11.680 --> 00:23:15.519
If you if you just do a lot of self-concept work, some deep self-exploration.
00:23:15.599 --> 00:23:16.880
I'm not saying that it's fun.
00:23:17.119 --> 00:23:18.000
Sometimes it's not.
00:23:18.240 --> 00:23:19.519
No, it's terrible, but it's worth it.
00:23:19.759 --> 00:23:20.960
Yeah, it's 100% worth it.
00:23:21.359 --> 00:23:22.640
So painful, but so worth it.
00:23:23.039 --> 00:23:31.119
Another thing that can make this an empowered archetype is surrounding yourself with the right people.
00:23:31.359 --> 00:23:31.759
Exactly.
00:23:32.000 --> 00:23:41.759
Surrounding yourself with the people that will genuinely see you and hear you and see that you are unique and see that you are an individual.
00:23:42.000 --> 00:23:42.480
Absolutely.
00:23:42.720 --> 00:23:44.240
And love all of those things.
00:23:44.480 --> 00:23:47.119
And also just like match your energy, right?
00:23:47.359 --> 00:23:55.200
Like most of the people who are basic girls like don't actually get to know their own energy because they're so suppressed.
00:23:56.000 --> 00:24:00.880
And they're trying to match other people's energy versus which is why they're always depleted.
00:24:01.119 --> 00:24:01.279
Yes.
00:24:01.599 --> 00:24:01.839
Yes.
00:24:02.000 --> 00:24:09.119
They're trying to match other people's energy because I do think that the a part of the basic girl also is wanting to be liked, wanting to fit in.
00:24:09.839 --> 00:24:11.440
So which makes sense.
00:24:11.680 --> 00:24:13.359
Most of us do want to be liked.
00:24:13.519 --> 00:24:14.960
Most of us do want to fit in.
00:24:15.359 --> 00:24:16.640
And that's not a bad thing.
00:24:17.440 --> 00:24:23.759
But you can there's a difference between being adaptable and fitting in, fitting into a box.
00:24:23.920 --> 00:24:24.240
Yes.
00:24:24.400 --> 00:24:29.279
You know, be adaptable, meet people where they're at, but don't compromise who you are.
00:24:29.440 --> 00:24:29.680
Yeah.
00:24:29.839 --> 00:24:32.880
And you need to know who you are in order to not compromise who you are.
00:24:33.039 --> 00:24:33.519
Absolutely.
00:24:33.759 --> 00:24:35.279
So that's the most important part to me.
00:24:35.599 --> 00:24:37.440
Basic girl, just get to know who you are.
00:24:37.599 --> 00:24:37.920
Yeah.
00:24:38.079 --> 00:24:40.559
And don't listen to what your parents told you you are.
00:24:40.720 --> 00:24:40.960
Yes.
00:24:41.200 --> 00:24:42.480
Because they're probably wrong, honestly.
00:24:42.720 --> 00:24:44.319
Or what anybody tells you that you are.
00:24:44.559 --> 00:24:44.960
But especially.
00:24:45.680 --> 00:24:45.839
Yeah.
00:24:46.000 --> 00:24:47.200
Or caregivers, whatever they are.
00:24:47.359 --> 00:24:48.480
They're they're almost always wrong.
00:24:48.640 --> 00:24:51.279
They're like, yeah, like 99% of the time, unfortunately.
00:24:51.440 --> 00:24:56.880
Um, but they're just trying to help you, you know, even though a lot of parents are like really not helpful.
00:24:59.119 --> 00:25:00.880
But you know, basic is safe, right?
00:25:01.119 --> 00:25:02.240
Yeah, basic is safe.
00:25:02.400 --> 00:25:02.640
Yeah.
00:25:02.799 --> 00:25:03.039
Yeah.
00:25:03.279 --> 00:25:06.000
Because you know, like this is so this is socially acceptable.
00:25:06.160 --> 00:25:07.119
I can like these things.
00:25:07.359 --> 00:25:07.920
Exactly.
00:25:08.079 --> 00:25:19.759
And I do think that we might try to, or we might just naturally embody or fall into this archetype when we have a deep need for safety.
00:25:20.079 --> 00:25:21.200
Ab so fucking.
00:25:22.000 --> 00:25:28.799
And it's like Maslow's hierarchy of needs, that takes priority versus being unique and an individual.
00:25:29.119 --> 00:25:35.680
But just make sure that you get to know who you are and try to fall in love with yourself.
00:25:35.920 --> 00:25:36.799
I love that.
00:25:36.960 --> 00:25:37.279
Yeah.
00:25:37.759 --> 00:25:38.400
I love that.
00:25:38.559 --> 00:25:39.440
I love that.
00:25:39.920 --> 00:25:41.119
Um, okay.
00:25:41.440 --> 00:25:44.960
What is your next archetype that you have for us?
00:25:45.200 --> 00:25:45.359
Okay.
00:25:45.519 --> 00:25:48.000
I'm gonna start with the mystic girl.
00:25:48.319 --> 00:25:51.119
So the mystic girl is like witchy.
00:25:51.599 --> 00:25:56.400
She's like always interested in just kind of seeing the spiritual side of things.
00:25:56.640 --> 00:26:00.400
She's always kind of like seeking enlightenment and cleansing and ritual.
00:26:00.480 --> 00:26:01.839
She loves her sage.
00:26:02.000 --> 00:26:07.119
She loves her crystals, she loves her like rituals and things like that.
00:26:07.279 --> 00:26:08.880
Um you coming for me right now.
00:26:09.440 --> 00:26:10.400
I feel like you're trying to come.
00:26:10.799 --> 00:26:11.599
A little bit.
00:26:13.039 --> 00:26:14.960
I am I am witchy girl FOIA.
00:26:15.039 --> 00:26:15.680
I know you are.
00:26:16.480 --> 00:26:18.400
I'm um, I think I'm heading there.
00:26:18.559 --> 00:26:20.079
I think I'm I think I'm headed in that direction.
00:26:20.240 --> 00:26:23.119
I feel like you've become more witchy since since I've gotten to know you.
00:26:23.279 --> 00:26:24.400
I like low key think I have to.
00:26:24.960 --> 00:26:27.039
It's like actually weird because I I'm not doing it on purpose.
00:26:27.119 --> 00:26:28.480
It's just where I'm naturally gravitating to.
00:26:28.960 --> 00:26:29.359
It happens.
00:26:29.599 --> 00:26:29.920
Yeah.
00:26:30.160 --> 00:26:34.480
Um, yeah, it's I it's like cosmic-y witchy kind of thing.
00:26:34.559 --> 00:26:37.920
But I definitely have long black hair and I wear a lot of black now.
00:26:38.160 --> 00:26:40.079
So well, I've always worn a lot of black.00:26:40.240 --> 00:26:50.720
Um so the witchy girl is just very like she she lives, she's one foot in her body, one foot in her spiritual world, right?00:26:50.880 --> 00:26:59.200
So she's like constantly embodying and being in the spirit, embodying being in her spirit, um, back and forth and back and forth between the two.00:26:59.279 --> 00:27:00.640
And so she's very heart.00:27:00.880 --> 00:27:05.039
And one of her shadows is she tends to wear her heart on her sleeve, similar to the lover girl.00:27:05.119 --> 00:27:05.440
Yeah.00:27:05.759 --> 00:27:09.599
Because like the spirit is really rooted in the heart, right?00:27:09.759 --> 00:27:11.759
So that's so true.00:27:12.240 --> 00:27:16.240
Actually, there are people that I know that embody this archetype way more than I do.00:27:16.640 --> 00:27:22.319
And they are, it's almost like they're not self-protective enough sometimes because they they do wear their heart on this, their sleeve.00:27:22.559 --> 00:27:22.880
Exactly.00:27:23.119 --> 00:27:28.319
They expect everybody to want the same genuine deep connection that they do.00:27:28.559 --> 00:27:30.160
And a lot of people don't, unfortunately.00:27:30.480 --> 00:27:36.160
Wait, because a lot of people like it's a form of enlightenment, but it's also it can be in its shadow a form of avoidance, right?00:27:36.400 --> 00:27:41.839
So yeah, absolutely, because you're kind of like not going into the body more.00:27:42.160 --> 00:27:57.680
And so the like wis the witchy, the mystic, like she's just constantly like pulling metaphors out of thin air that are like so for some reason true and coherent, yet also if you've never touched on that, they are so off-putting.00:27:57.920 --> 00:27:58.240
Yeah.00:27:58.400 --> 00:27:59.759
Um, and so like that's the thing.00:27:59.839 --> 00:28:03.519
But she's so her like her desire is to like connect, right?00:28:03.680 --> 00:28:08.160
Her desire is to be connected, but she's throwing her connection out everywhere.00:28:08.480 --> 00:28:09.519
She can freak people out.00:28:10.000 --> 00:28:11.440
Oh my god, can she ever?00:28:11.599 --> 00:28:12.000
Yeah, right.00:28:12.079 --> 00:28:14.240
You know, I mean, Joan of Arc got burned at the fucking stake.00:28:14.400 --> 00:28:14.480
Yeah.00:28:14.880 --> 00:28:16.640
She because I love her.00:28:17.200 --> 00:28:18.000
We love that.00:28:18.240 --> 00:28:19.759
Um, yeah, but like that's the thing.00:28:19.839 --> 00:28:23.119
Like, you know, she's gonna get like we'll get our little heads chopped off at some point, I'm sure.00:28:23.200 --> 00:28:23.359
Yeah.00:28:23.519 --> 00:28:24.079
But maybe.00:28:24.400 --> 00:28:26.799
Paraselton Kim Kardashian, Joan of Arc.00:28:27.519 --> 00:28:29.839
We forgot her when we were talking about that.00:28:30.079 --> 00:28:30.720
How could we?00:28:30.880 --> 00:28:37.279
Um, like truly, like it's uh it the mystic girl, she's like, she's she also probably smokes some weed.00:28:37.359 --> 00:28:43.119
Um she also, you know, like probably does shrooms at the festivals and shit like that.00:28:43.279 --> 00:28:45.039
Because I mean, get enlightened, right?00:28:45.200 --> 00:28:45.359
Yeah.00:28:45.519 --> 00:28:48.319
Um, but she's she is seeking like her own form of enlightenment, right?00:28:48.400 --> 00:28:51.599
And so the empowered version of her is enlightened.00:28:51.839 --> 00:29:02.880
The empowered version of her, like, knows to not curse her own future, curse her own self, curse the others around her, but instead like figure out where her blessings are.00:29:02.960 --> 00:29:07.920
And this is like getting into that spiritual side of things, figure out where her blessings are and actually connect to them, right?00:29:08.160 --> 00:29:13.599
Figure out where she's able to bring blessing to the world around her without sacrificing her safety.00:29:13.839 --> 00:29:14.319
Yeah.00:29:14.640 --> 00:29:34.160
So being really in who she is and being connected both to her body and her spirit and her mind, because that tends to also be a little bit under um utilized if she's never really like gone on kind of an existential journey because she's again one foot in the body, one foot in the spirit.00:29:34.400 --> 00:29:34.640
Right.00:29:34.799 --> 00:29:35.039
Yeah.00:29:35.200 --> 00:29:35.440
Right.00:29:35.680 --> 00:29:42.640
So the the true like embodied or the true empowered witchyness is like triangular in that it's the mind, body, spirit.00:29:42.880 --> 00:29:43.119
Yeah.00:29:43.279 --> 00:29:43.440
Yeah.00:29:43.599 --> 00:29:43.839
Yeah.00:29:44.160 --> 00:29:45.200
That makes a lot of sense.00:29:45.359 --> 00:29:48.880
So what would an empowered version of this archetype look like to you?00:29:49.119 --> 00:29:50.160
So coherent, right?00:29:50.240 --> 00:29:53.519
So like the the soul, mind, body are all aligned.00:29:53.680 --> 00:29:57.920
The like understanding of the internal and the external makes sense.00:29:58.000 --> 00:30:00.160
There's coherence between the internal and the external.00:30:00.559 --> 00:30:07.599
Um, the embodied version of this is somebody who projects their love and their light outward as opposed to living in their darkness.00:30:08.079 --> 00:30:18.640
Um, because the darkness has a purpose always, but more often than not, once you've like alchemized your pain, it becomes light pretty much across the board.00:30:18.880 --> 00:30:31.119
And so for somebody who's like witchy and mystic, um, she's using her skills, her faith, her belief, her spirituality, her enlightenment, her soul to bring others to that as well.00:30:31.279 --> 00:30:31.440
Right.00:30:31.519 --> 00:30:33.680
Like she also acts kind of as like a portal for that.00:30:33.839 --> 00:30:34.160
Yeah.00:30:34.319 --> 00:30:39.680
For which for you, like if you're this witchy type, part of the reason why you're empowered is because you're a therapist.00:30:40.160 --> 00:30:41.440
You know, like that's the portal.00:30:41.759 --> 00:30:51.599
I do think that it's probably better that way for the most part, versus putting blind faith into spells and things like that.00:30:51.680 --> 00:31:00.880
And I'm a big believer that anything can be a spell, any thought, yeah, any uh a birthday wish is a spell, a prayer is a spell.00:31:01.039 --> 00:31:02.000
They're all the same thing.00:31:02.240 --> 00:31:03.119
Yeah, yeah.00:31:03.359 --> 00:31:11.759
And I I feel like um, like for me, my witchiness is a lot of just like it's it's almost like meditative, like it's just a lot of meditations.00:31:11.920 --> 00:31:13.039
I just meditate a ton.00:31:13.279 --> 00:31:16.799
Like I'm just constantly meditating and like you know, psilocybin and all that stuff.00:31:16.880 --> 00:31:18.640
It's just like like that shit.00:31:18.720 --> 00:31:20.319
I'm like the I don't know what you call that one.00:31:20.480 --> 00:31:22.640
I think that if you were a witch, you'd be a cosmic witch.00:31:22.880 --> 00:31:23.519
That's what I was gonna say.00:31:23.599 --> 00:31:24.880
Like a cosmic girl.00:31:25.119 --> 00:31:31.200
Cosm cosmic witches are um, I'm eclectic because I of course I see it's the same thing as a therapist.00:31:31.359 --> 00:31:33.920
I'm like, they're all they're all amazing.00:31:34.160 --> 00:31:40.079
Um but cosmic witches are uh they they do pay a lot of attention to the moon.00:31:40.160 --> 00:31:50.960
They might pay a lot of attention to uh the zodiac as well and astrology, not necessarily, but um they do believe in the forces of nature and physics.00:31:51.279 --> 00:31:54.160
Um and I'm a quantum witch.00:31:54.319 --> 00:31:55.519
A quantum witch, yeah.00:31:55.680 --> 00:31:56.160
Okay, yeah.00:31:56.240 --> 00:32:00.960
I'm like obsessed with like quantum mechanics and yeah, manifestation meditation.00:32:01.119 --> 00:32:02.559
Yeah, the quantum girly.00:32:02.960 --> 00:32:04.079
We didn't quantum girly.00:32:04.319 --> 00:32:05.599
Yes, yeah, yes.00:32:05.680 --> 00:32:09.519
I want to I want to coin ferret girly, which was we were talking about before.00:32:09.599 --> 00:32:10.079
Oh my god, yeah.00:32:10.240 --> 00:32:12.240
Because I'm like, you've heard of horse girls.00:32:12.559 --> 00:32:15.200
Have you heard of ferret girls?00:32:16.000 --> 00:32:17.359
I am a ferret girl.00:32:17.680 --> 00:32:20.319
Welcome to ferret girl psychology.00:32:22.559 --> 00:32:23.359
We're a ferret.00:32:23.680 --> 00:32:24.000
Oh my gosh.00:32:24.559 --> 00:32:26.880
Oh, my inner child just jizzed.00:32:31.440 --> 00:32:34.559
That was the best thing that I ever could have done for my inner child.00:32:34.799 --> 00:32:38.720
I literally just had like a flashback to her and in the ferret room.00:32:39.119 --> 00:32:40.400
Yeah, so we had a ferret room.00:32:40.559 --> 00:32:40.880
Oh my god.00:32:41.039 --> 00:32:43.599
Um that's so extra.00:32:43.839 --> 00:32:46.400
Yeah, I had a whole red room.00:32:47.279 --> 00:32:47.680
Yeah.00:32:48.000 --> 00:32:50.319
Who needs a guest room when you can have a red room?00:32:50.640 --> 00:32:52.240
Literally the most Deanna should have ever heard.00:32:52.319 --> 00:32:53.279
Yeah, I love that so much.00:32:53.440 --> 00:32:53.599
Yeah.00:32:53.759 --> 00:32:54.160
I love that.00:32:54.240 --> 00:32:54.640
Oh my god.00:32:54.799 --> 00:32:55.359
I love that.00:32:55.519 --> 00:32:56.240
I love that.00:32:56.480 --> 00:32:57.920
Okay, what's your number two?00:32:58.319 --> 00:32:58.640
Okay.00:32:59.279 --> 00:33:02.079
So my number two is ferret girl.00:33:02.160 --> 00:33:03.279
Is ferret girl.00:33:03.920 --> 00:33:04.480
JK.00:33:05.039 --> 00:33:08.720
My second archetype is the good girl.00:33:08.960 --> 00:33:10.079
The good girl.00:33:10.240 --> 00:33:10.400
Oh.00:33:10.799 --> 00:33:12.400
This is such a common one.00:33:12.720 --> 00:33:13.599
Love to hear the good girl.00:33:13.839 --> 00:33:16.720
So I needed to do this one because I this is such a common one.00:33:16.799 --> 00:33:18.000
I have so many thoughts about it.00:33:18.160 --> 00:33:18.400
Yeah.00:33:18.559 --> 00:33:25.359
But we also we see this archetype across media, books, yeah, movies.00:33:26.079 --> 00:33:30.079
She's oftentimes the main character.00:33:30.240 --> 00:33:33.039
She's like the virgin, yeah, like character.00:33:33.119 --> 00:33:38.720
And then she either falls in love and lives happily ever after, or she like gets corrupted.00:33:38.799 --> 00:33:38.960
Yeah.00:33:39.119 --> 00:33:40.319
And those are her two options.00:33:40.480 --> 00:33:41.359
That's like all she gets.00:33:41.440 --> 00:33:41.599
Yes.00:33:41.920 --> 00:33:42.240
Two choices.00:33:42.480 --> 00:33:44.480
That's why you point.00:33:44.960 --> 00:33:45.519
Yes.00:33:45.839 --> 00:33:46.319
Yes.00:33:47.039 --> 00:34:01.119
Um, but so the good girl, she's uh pure, she's nice to everyone, nice, not necessarily kind, nice, nice, nice, she's innocent, she can be naive.00:34:01.279 --> 00:34:08.159
Yeah, she is soft and warm, and she always does the right thing.00:34:08.880 --> 00:34:17.840
You know, and she a lot of times when we see this portrayed in the media, she will make the male main character want to be a better person.00:34:18.239 --> 00:34:23.199
Yeah, but that's like not actually always the case in real life.00:34:23.519 --> 00:34:24.719
No, not at all.00:34:24.960 --> 00:34:25.440
Not at all.00:34:25.840 --> 00:34:31.280
Definitely in the media because they're like, we want all the girls to be good girls, but then in real life.00:34:31.599 --> 00:34:37.920
Also, in real life, women don't exist to just make men better.00:34:38.320 --> 00:34:40.239
However, in movies they do.00:34:40.480 --> 00:34:41.760
Manic Pixie Dream Girl.00:34:42.320 --> 00:34:45.920
That's that's that whole that is that whole belief.00:34:46.159 --> 00:34:47.360
Do you know what the Bechtel test is?00:34:47.599 --> 00:34:49.119
Of course I know what the Bechtel test is.00:34:49.199 --> 00:34:50.400
I was a screenwriting major.00:34:50.800 --> 00:35:04.000
It is it is that a a movie has to have an entire scene in which it's just women and they are talking about something that is anything else other than a man.00:35:04.320 --> 00:35:05.840
That is the Bechtel test.00:35:05.920 --> 00:35:08.800
And if it passes, means they didn't talk about a man.00:35:09.039 --> 00:35:12.559
And so the first movie to ever pass that was called The Women.00:35:13.599 --> 00:35:14.960
Oh my God, I didn't know that.00:35:15.119 --> 00:35:15.360
Yeah.00:35:15.519 --> 00:35:15.760
Wow.00:35:16.000 --> 00:35:17.119
That's hot girl psychology.00:35:17.280 --> 00:35:18.639
That's hot girl psychology.00:35:18.800 --> 00:35:19.440
Yeah.00:35:19.679 --> 00:35:25.280
Um, so actually, these archetypes, too.00:35:25.440 --> 00:35:32.880
I I feel like I I very much studied a lot of screen archetypes as a screenwriting major.00:35:32.960 --> 00:35:33.119
Yeah.00:35:33.280 --> 00:35:35.039
So femme fatale was a huge one.00:35:35.199 --> 00:35:36.639
The good girl was a huge one.00:35:36.800 --> 00:35:37.039
Yeah.00:35:37.199 --> 00:35:43.519
In a film noirs, there were always archetypes, and usually always there was the femme fatale and the good girl.00:35:43.920 --> 00:35:46.800
And the man always won in the end.00:35:47.039 --> 00:35:48.000
So it didn't really matter.00:35:48.400 --> 00:35:48.800
Of course.00:35:48.960 --> 00:35:54.000
Um, but usually the femme fatale was thought or it could be siren, either, either way.00:35:54.079 --> 00:36:01.199
They're they're and they're pretty similar, but they would usually be the one that loses and be seen as evil and demonized.00:36:01.280 --> 00:36:11.039
And then the good girl was just like so pure good and pure and pure, and either the guy would end up with her or um he wouldn't, but either way he would somehow win.00:36:11.199 --> 00:36:11.440
Yeah.00:36:11.599 --> 00:36:12.480
Um yeah, absolutely.00:36:12.719 --> 00:36:19.519
And she she wouldn't really, because she either she'd end up with a shitty male that only cared about himself, or she'd end up alone.00:36:19.840 --> 00:36:24.719
So women basically didn't exist for some reason up until like recently.00:36:25.119 --> 00:36:26.239
Up until like just now.00:36:26.480 --> 00:36:29.440
Like actually, yeah, like low-key, like so sorry, girls.00:36:29.519 --> 00:36:32.239
We know you're there, we know we're here, but the men.00:36:32.639 --> 00:36:33.119
Yes.00:36:34.239 --> 00:36:40.400
To me, the good girl is one of the most fetishized archetypes.00:36:40.559 --> 00:36:40.960
Yeah.00:36:41.199 --> 00:36:51.519
I have so many thoughts about this being fetishized because I feel like I have been in a silent war with this archetype.00:36:51.760 --> 00:36:52.079
Okay.00:36:52.320 --> 00:36:53.119
Like forever.00:36:53.280 --> 00:36:53.599
Okay.00:36:53.920 --> 00:36:59.679
Because it was something I always wanted to embody and be seen as the good girl.00:37:00.000 --> 00:37:00.320
Okay.00:37:00.559 --> 00:37:02.320
And I could never hack it.00:37:02.880 --> 00:37:03.440
Wow.00:37:03.760 --> 00:37:10.719
Um, and I think I I really just wanted to be innocent and pure.00:37:10.800 --> 00:37:11.039
Yeah.00:37:11.360 --> 00:37:19.840
And to be seen that way, and I am not, and I haven't been for a really long time.00:37:20.000 --> 00:37:20.239
Yeah.00:37:20.559 --> 00:37:21.679
And that's okay.00:37:22.559 --> 00:37:23.519
Radical acceptance.00:37:23.840 --> 00:37:24.079
Yeah.00:37:24.159 --> 00:37:30.079
But it it took me a long time to be okay with that, to radically accept that fact.00:37:30.480 --> 00:37:30.719
Yeah.00:37:30.960 --> 00:37:39.360
I I feel like I actually tried really hard to embody this archetype in my late teens and early 20s specifically.00:37:40.079 --> 00:37:46.400
I got this obsessive need to prove that I was a good person.00:37:47.039 --> 00:37:47.519
Yeah.00:37:47.760 --> 00:37:56.639
I don't know if it was to everybody else or if it was to myself, but I I feel like the fact that you became an existential therapist says that it was to yourself.00:37:57.119 --> 00:37:57.360
Yeah.00:37:57.840 --> 00:37:59.039
To yourself through everyone else.00:37:59.360 --> 00:38:00.079
Through everybody else, yeah.00:38:00.480 --> 00:38:01.360
External validation of it.00:38:01.679 --> 00:38:06.639
External validation because I I see myself through the lens of other people's eyes.00:38:06.800 --> 00:38:07.360
Yeah.00:38:07.679 --> 00:38:13.679
But I I got obsessive about this need to prove that I was a good person.00:38:13.840 --> 00:38:19.760
And I reflected on it fairly recently in the last few few years of that time in my life.00:38:20.079 --> 00:38:24.960
And I was asking the question of like, where did this obsession come from?00:38:25.199 --> 00:38:25.599
Yeah.00:38:26.880 --> 00:38:28.639
Where where did this need come from?00:38:28.800 --> 00:38:34.559
Because there did I need to prove that I wasn't a bad person?00:38:34.880 --> 00:38:39.679
Because there was no evidence to support that I would have been a bad person.00:38:40.239 --> 00:38:42.719
The only person I had ever hurt was myself.00:38:43.440 --> 00:38:50.000
So by my morals and ethics, I wouldn't have been a bad person.00:38:50.159 --> 00:38:52.159
So I was like, what was I trying to prove?00:38:53.039 --> 00:39:06.159
And I realized again in the recent years upon reflection and trauma processing that I associated being a good person with being a pure and innocent person.00:39:06.559 --> 00:39:07.199
Wow.00:39:07.440 --> 00:39:08.719
And I wasn't that.00:39:08.960 --> 00:39:12.639
So in turn, I wasn't a good person.00:39:12.719 --> 00:39:17.599
But the the pure and innocent thing was taken from me.00:39:17.760 --> 00:39:18.079
Yeah.00:39:18.400 --> 00:39:23.599
When I was so young, and then just continued to be taken.00:39:24.000 --> 00:39:34.719
Um but that's actually that is a huge theme of the the book that that I'm coming out with, Confessions of a Sugar Baby.00:39:35.039 --> 00:39:42.159
The main character uh her name is Serena, and she's the opposite of the good girl archetype.00:39:42.239 --> 00:39:42.960
She's the siren.00:39:43.039 --> 00:39:44.000
She's the siren archetype.00:39:44.079 --> 00:39:45.920
That's why I named her Serena, Serena the Siren.00:39:46.159 --> 00:39:46.880
Serena the Siren.00:39:47.039 --> 00:39:48.639
But so she is Serena the Siren.00:39:48.880 --> 00:39:49.119
Yeah.00:39:49.599 --> 00:39:52.239
But so she is the opposite of the good girl.00:39:52.480 --> 00:40:01.519
And the biggest themes of the book are one, that innocence is just a lack of experience.00:40:02.000 --> 00:40:03.119
And who wants that?00:40:03.920 --> 00:40:05.840
So why the fuck do we fetishize it?00:40:06.639 --> 00:40:10.320
Two is that innocence is a luxury.00:40:10.639 --> 00:40:10.960
Yeah.00:40:11.199 --> 00:40:14.079
And not everybody is lucky enough to still have it.00:40:14.400 --> 00:40:14.960
Yes.00:40:15.280 --> 00:40:18.880
And for some of us, it is taken.00:40:19.039 --> 00:40:23.519
For a lot of people, innocence is taken from them and it's not a choice.00:40:23.760 --> 00:40:24.079
No.00:40:24.719 --> 00:40:28.880
And survivors of essay, I'll say.00:40:29.039 --> 00:40:34.000
Survivors of essay and abuse will know exactly what I'm talking about.00:40:34.239 --> 00:40:34.400
Yeah.00:40:34.559 --> 00:40:35.440
Oh, girl, yeah.00:40:35.760 --> 00:40:42.000
When you have that type of violation at any age, but especially when you're young.00:40:42.159 --> 00:40:42.800
Yes.00:40:43.840 --> 00:40:47.599
Something is taken, something feels gone.00:40:47.760 --> 00:40:48.159
Yeah.00:40:48.480 --> 00:40:52.480
And what is left in its place feels dirty.00:40:52.719 --> 00:40:53.119
Yeah.00:40:53.360 --> 00:40:57.119
Like you could scrub and scrub and scrub and you will never be clean again.00:40:57.360 --> 00:40:57.920
It's a stain.00:40:58.000 --> 00:40:59.360
I used to feel like a stain.00:40:59.599 --> 00:41:02.239
When I was processing through it, it felt like a stain that I couldn't erase.00:41:02.480 --> 00:41:03.840
It's a stain that you can't erase.00:41:04.320 --> 00:41:06.559
It's something that everyone can see and it's why I'm back.00:41:06.880 --> 00:41:07.119
Yes.00:41:07.599 --> 00:41:09.519
To me, it feels like branding.00:41:09.760 --> 00:41:10.159
Yeah.00:41:10.800 --> 00:41:12.800
Like a branded piece of flesh.00:41:13.039 --> 00:41:13.360
Yeah.00:41:13.920 --> 00:41:17.599
And people can fucking smell the burning flesh light on your face on your face.00:41:17.840 --> 00:41:18.079
Yes.00:41:18.320 --> 00:41:18.480
Yeah.00:41:18.559 --> 00:41:20.000
No, it's like it's it's yeah.00:41:20.079 --> 00:41:20.559
Oh my god.00:41:20.800 --> 00:41:24.400
It's like men see that and then they're like, my turn.00:41:24.639 --> 00:41:24.960
Oh.00:41:25.519 --> 00:41:27.280
That just stabbed me in the heart.00:41:27.599 --> 00:41:31.039
That's literally that that was really that was intense.00:41:31.280 --> 00:41:32.400
It's fucked, it's fucked up.00:41:32.880 --> 00:41:33.760
Sorry, I'm the emo girl.00:41:33.920 --> 00:41:35.039
No, no, no, that was good.00:41:35.360 --> 00:41:35.760
That was good.00:41:36.000 --> 00:41:38.239
I like I I l I live for a good emo moment.00:41:38.480 --> 00:41:38.639
Yeah.00:41:38.719 --> 00:41:39.840
Um that's fucking so true.00:41:40.079 --> 00:41:40.239
Yeah.00:41:40.480 --> 00:41:41.119
So fucking true.00:41:41.360 --> 00:41:53.679
That's what I I feel like this archetype not only is it a luxury, um, so it's not everybody gets to be the good girl.00:41:53.840 --> 00:41:54.239
Yeah.00:41:54.559 --> 00:42:00.960
But also it's a very, very primal archetype because nobody can stay the good girl forever.00:42:01.199 --> 00:42:01.519
Never.00:42:01.679 --> 00:42:07.280
Because if innocence is just a lack of experience, eventually you will experience heartbreak, pain, something.00:42:07.599 --> 00:42:08.800
And then you won't be the good girl.00:42:08.960 --> 00:42:09.199
Yeah.00:42:09.440 --> 00:42:13.360
So this is a very young, a very primal archetype to me.00:42:13.519 --> 00:42:13.840
Yeah.00:42:14.000 --> 00:42:16.559
And so it bothers me that it's so fetishized.00:42:16.800 --> 00:42:17.119
Yeah.00:42:17.280 --> 00:42:17.599
You know?00:42:17.760 --> 00:42:17.920
Yeah.00:42:18.159 --> 00:42:20.639
Because we shouldn't be fetishizing something so primal.00:42:20.719 --> 00:42:22.400
We shouldn't be fetishizing something so young.00:42:22.639 --> 00:42:23.280
No, whatever.00:42:23.840 --> 00:42:24.000
No.00:42:24.320 --> 00:42:24.639
Yeah.00:42:24.719 --> 00:42:33.119
And but so I do think that to be an empowered version of this archetype, one, like just like enjoy it while 11.00:42:33.760 --> 00:42:34.239
No, truly.00:42:34.320 --> 00:42:36.000
The kind of youth is wasted on the young, right?00:42:36.239 --> 00:42:36.800
Yes, yes.00:42:37.039 --> 00:42:40.000
Because you are you are not going to stay the good girl forever.00:42:40.079 --> 00:42:57.119
Um, but that being said, also when you do start morphing into other archetypes, when you do get more experience, when you do unfortunately witness and feel how cruel the world can be, hold on to the good parts of this archetype because there are really good parts.00:42:57.199 --> 00:43:01.519
The the soft, the softness, the warmth, those are really good parts.00:43:01.679 --> 00:43:02.079
Yeah.00:43:02.239 --> 00:43:07.840
Um hold on to the staying true to your morals, to your virtues.00:43:08.000 --> 00:43:08.480
Yeah.00:43:08.800 --> 00:43:18.800
Though those are really, really good parts of it that I think can stay with a person even after they have seen the rain.00:43:19.119 --> 00:43:19.519
Yeah.00:43:19.760 --> 00:43:21.039
Yeah, absolutely.00:43:21.199 --> 00:43:32.400
And I feel like it's, you know, what's interesting is so there are there are parts of me that lost the goodness growing up, and then there are parts like as a kiddo, and then there were parts of me that lost goodness as an adult.00:43:32.880 --> 00:43:36.239
Um primarily the goodness lost CSA, right?00:43:36.320 --> 00:43:37.039
When I was growing up.00:43:37.199 --> 00:43:43.039
And then as an adult, um through my divorce, I felt like a lot of innocence was lost.00:43:43.760 --> 00:43:48.000
And that was a really like interesting experience.00:43:48.159 --> 00:43:48.480
Yeah.00:43:48.719 --> 00:43:56.880
Um, because what it has done is it's made me like more protective over the good parts of me.00:43:57.039 --> 00:43:57.280
Yeah.00:43:57.440 --> 00:43:59.760
Um, it's made me protective over the good parts.00:44:00.159 --> 00:44:06.639
like traits that I have, and uh it's something that I encourage everyone to do is like keep things that are just yours.00:44:06.800 --> 00:44:07.039
Yeah.00:44:07.199 --> 00:44:16.960
Like keep keep innocent things that are just yours because all of the right people you can't rely on them to be as good to you as you can be.00:44:17.280 --> 00:44:22.400
Like even the best people in your life, like you can always be better to yourself than anyone else.00:44:23.039 --> 00:44:23.519
Absolutely.00:44:23.760 --> 00:44:24.079
Always.00:44:24.320 --> 00:44:26.079
You can buy yourself flowers.00:44:26.480 --> 00:44:26.800
Yes.00:44:26.880 --> 00:44:27.920
You can hold your own hand.00:44:28.400 --> 00:44:30.559
You can write your name in the sand is what the highly saw.00:44:31.920 --> 00:44:32.159
Yes.00:44:32.320 --> 00:44:32.480
Yeah.00:44:32.719 --> 00:44:32.880
Yeah.00:44:33.199 --> 00:44:43.280
Um but like what you can do is like and then with the right people like they will also have, you know, like if you're in like a heterosexual relationship, a good boy, right?00:44:43.360 --> 00:44:45.039
Like he has his own innocence as well.00:44:45.119 --> 00:44:49.119
That's like it's not just like hot girl psychology is the only kind of like hot people psychology.00:44:49.199 --> 00:44:50.719
There's also hot guy psychology, I guess.00:44:50.880 --> 00:44:52.719
Hot boy absolutely hot boy psychology.00:44:52.800 --> 00:44:52.880
Yeah.00:44:53.119 --> 00:44:56.639
Hot boy psychology, oh my God, in 20 years when that comes out, I'm so gonna be a listener.00:44:56.800 --> 00:44:57.039
Yeah.00:44:57.199 --> 00:45:12.320
Um but like the same thing like you know and then for people who are in um non-heterosexual relationships just the like good person, the good girl that you find that you love, like protect their innocence as well.00:45:12.400 --> 00:45:12.639
Right.00:45:12.719 --> 00:45:14.960
Like if as much as you can for as long as you can.00:45:15.199 --> 00:45:18.559
If somebody shares their innocence with you, never ever ever take advantage of it.00:45:18.719 --> 00:45:19.440
Don't exploit it.00:45:19.599 --> 00:45:20.159
Never ever.00:45:20.320 --> 00:45:20.559
Yeah.00:45:20.719 --> 00:45:20.960
Yeah.00:45:21.119 --> 00:45:21.440
Yeah.00:45:21.760 --> 00:45:22.079
Okay.00:45:22.400 --> 00:45:25.119
So what is your next archetype?00:45:25.280 --> 00:45:30.480
Oh so talking about moving away from the pain my second archetype is the feral girl.00:45:30.960 --> 00:45:36.559
Feral girl the feral girl not to be not to be confused with the ferret girl.00:45:36.800 --> 00:45:39.760
But the feral girl not to be confused with me.00:45:41.519 --> 00:45:45.840
So the feral girl is really like she's just chaotic like low-key.00:45:45.920 --> 00:45:46.800
She's super chaotic.00:45:46.880 --> 00:45:48.800
Um okay is this BPD girl?00:45:49.039 --> 00:46:01.199
Yes absolutely absolutely so feral girl is your like 3 a.m nachos drunk off your ass like day six dry shampoo.00:46:01.440 --> 00:46:06.559
She's like your I totally wash this because I sprayed it with Fabriz.00:46:06.960 --> 00:46:12.079
She is like your I don't even know that I'm supposed to be in class right now.00:46:12.159 --> 00:46:13.760
And what do you mean we had an assignment due?00:46:13.920 --> 00:46:14.400
Like fuck.00:46:14.559 --> 00:46:15.679
This is just me in college.00:46:15.840 --> 00:46:19.519
Like this is we all have the feral girl inside of us.00:46:20.079 --> 00:46:25.519
But she you know she's like lost her phone 10 times since I started this conversation.00:46:25.679 --> 00:46:27.199
And also me in college.00:46:27.599 --> 00:46:29.039
We've never been able to find her vape pen.00:46:29.280 --> 00:46:30.639
And she has like 20 of them.00:46:30.880 --> 00:46:34.239
And she keeps asking others to hit hers and it's like getting annoying.00:46:34.960 --> 00:46:40.400
It's getting annoying it's getting noticeable so real.00:46:40.960 --> 00:46:48.480
Yeah she just like cannot seem to get her shit together but she is such a blass to hang out with she's a beautiful mess.00:46:48.719 --> 00:46:49.280
Oh my God.00:46:49.360 --> 00:46:58.480
Yeah she's such a beautiful mess and she is she is so much fun to hang out with like she is absolutely like you have the time of your fucking life with her but girl you are gonna be taking care of her later tonight.00:46:58.639 --> 00:47:05.039
Yeah like you are gonna be she's gonna you do not know if she's gonna cry if she's gonna laugh if she's gonna fight someone you have no fucking clue.00:47:05.119 --> 00:47:10.559
She is an animal through and through she is connected to her animus in every way.00:47:10.719 --> 00:47:28.880
Yeah every fucking way her anima in every way so the feral girl my friends that knew me from like 2011 through like through like 2018 smoking on the floor right now.00:47:29.280 --> 00:47:38.079
Any any of my friends who knew me from 1991 until about 2025 is saying I right so until a month ago.00:47:38.400 --> 00:47:56.400
No it is what it is um like literally I yeah feral is exactly how I would describe the way I was growing up like I was even feral about food like a little give me the food right you know but like um she has like no social graces but she's beautiful and she has a beautiful mess.00:47:56.639 --> 00:48:07.519
A beautiful fucking mess she really is and and she gets invited to everything she gets you know she's chosen for everything but she just she just can't get it together no matter what she does.00:48:07.679 --> 00:48:17.519
Yeah um so the shadow of her is that she's not taking care of herself right she just doesn't care about herself she doesn't care and she's barely treading water she's trying to care but she cannot seem to care.00:48:17.599 --> 00:48:27.440
She's like gonna go and say like well I'm gonna go do a detox and that's gonna fix it all or I'm gonna go like I'm gonna get all my blackheads removed and that's gonna fix it all.00:48:27.760 --> 00:48:38.719
She always has like these radical ideas of that I'm gonna do this and it's gonna heal everything and either she doesn't do it, doesn't follow through, or she does it and then it's like wherever you go, there you are.00:48:38.960 --> 00:48:45.440
Wherever you go, there you fucking are absolutely absolutely she's a tautology it is what it is right.00:48:45.679 --> 00:49:15.760
She is 100% like the highs and the lows embodied then in that like way her so like she like oscillates right like very she's she's black and white and she's oscillating all the time the empowered version of her sits on a wavelength that is just very calm very still and it's very like the the frequency so to speak cosmic ass witch bitch um is like very uh like not disruptive and so it's more controlled.00:49:15.920 --> 00:49:19.039
It's it's just balanced yeah exactly exactly what you're saying controlled.00:49:19.360 --> 00:49:27.039
Internal locus of control like we were talking about internal locus of control yes yeah yeah which is so weird because like she is the embodiment of internal locus of control.00:49:27.360 --> 00:49:40.320
She is like creating her own chaos she she is the she is the bringer of her own chaos and she absolutely like does that in an attempt to control her chaos which is so interesting.00:49:40.400 --> 00:49:44.880
It's like create the chaos you are you are yes controlling it.00:49:45.280 --> 00:49:51.599
She is the Ouroboros of the hot girl archetype she is a snake eating its own tail in every way shape and form.00:49:51.760 --> 00:50:02.239
Yeah and so but like once she gets to a point of being empowered she is actually very very very visceral.00:50:02.880 --> 00:50:07.360
So she knows how to tap into that animalistic side of her to make anything happen.00:50:08.159 --> 00:50:17.280
So what I see with the feral girl as she gets more empowered is she knows exactly what she wants because she's been feral.00:50:17.440 --> 00:50:23.679
She has survived on her base impulses for so long that she knows exactly what she wants.00:50:23.920 --> 00:50:27.039
So she doesn't she's almost like an animalistic knowledge.00:50:27.280 --> 00:50:36.000
Exactly exactly whereas a lot of people don't ever explore their animalistic urges they hide a they hide from it they shy away from it.00:50:38.000 --> 00:50:41.599
Yeah have like a screaming orgasm at some point in your life yeah it's worth it.00:50:41.840 --> 00:50:47.440
Yeah genuinely but so so this makes sense that this could actually be an incredibly empowered person.00:50:47.599 --> 00:50:48.079
Oh my God.00:50:48.320 --> 00:50:51.599
Because they have explored that and they've explored the darkness too.00:50:51.840 --> 00:51:00.400
There's also something to be said about being messy, about being imperfect about allowing people to see that I think that there's something so beautiful about that as well.00:51:00.559 --> 00:51:12.880
But then being able to do that in a more balanced way I also imagine that prioritizing peace versus chaos and knowing the difference would be a huge element of this.00:51:13.199 --> 00:51:15.760
I have to have an extraordinarily regimented schedule.00:51:15.840 --> 00:51:58.400
I basically tamed myself right so you tame the feral animal inside of you I have an extraordinarily regimented schedule I am like I don't I I I'm like a like a you know how they train like um uh service animals and they do not you are not allowed to touch them yeah yeah you are not only are you not allowed to touch them but like you are not allowed to like when they are in their working mode you cannot fucking waver you cannot make a mistake you must train them perfectly um so they don't get confused and you cannot let them have they you can never ever ever say yes to them when the answer is no because that's just like they need to know like how to actually act in an emergency.00:51:58.480 --> 00:51:59.519
Yeah because they're animals.00:51:59.840 --> 00:52:00.159
Right.00:52:00.320 --> 00:52:02.000
And if you treat yourself that way.00:52:02.320 --> 00:52:04.400
They're all like classic conditioning.00:52:04.559 --> 00:52:16.480
Yeah and so and that is very very black and white and it has to be it is and so the way that I speak to my own black and white self is like I'm very very regimented with my schedule I'm very very regimented with like my routines and things like that.00:52:16.639 --> 00:52:18.960
And it it keeps me comfortable.00:52:19.199 --> 00:52:27.920
It's uncomfortable to achieve as much comfort as I have yeah yeah like the the the comfort is uncomfortable.00:52:28.000 --> 00:52:28.159
Yeah.00:52:28.400 --> 00:52:42.480
It is yeah so like I look at comfort now as not just like what's familiar but I look at comfort as like having enough income which means I must be like working pretty hard and if I work really hard then I have to be like really intentional about taking care of myself.00:52:42.559 --> 00:53:01.519
And if I'm intentional about taking care of myself I have to be really on top of my mental health if I'm really on top of my mental health I have to be taking care of my relationships, my priorities, you know, that kind of thing like take care of my body, et cetera you tame the animal inside of you and then you actually become empowered.00:53:01.840 --> 00:53:06.480
So you kind of um you kind of have to divorce yourself a little bit from the feral girl.00:53:06.719 --> 00:53:13.039
Yeah to understand her like discipline discipline is a huge piece of healing the feral animal inside of you.00:53:13.440 --> 00:53:16.719
It's huge structure it's taming.00:53:16.880 --> 00:53:19.039
It's it's not domesticating it's taming.00:53:19.519 --> 00:53:19.840
Right?00:53:20.000 --> 00:53:33.119
Domesticating is like um pacifying and softening but taming is like keeping yourself stimulated in ways that make it so you don't eat your bite the hand that feeds you.00:53:33.280 --> 00:53:33.599
Yes.00:53:33.840 --> 00:53:47.440
Bite it the fuck off right so um so the the feral girl inside of you she is she is so much fun but it she's finite she is ultimately finite.00:53:47.679 --> 00:54:16.639
Yeah yeah yeah so she she also it sounds like she's a more primal a more primal archetype I think something to think about too is if you have whether it is any past version of you whether it's chaotic whether it is addiction something that was loud and fun yeah you need to go and make your current life better and more appealing than that.00:54:17.039 --> 00:54:19.119
Exactly which is why I'm doing a fucking podcast.00:54:19.360 --> 00:54:42.320
Yes yeah no like you need you need to have you need to have a lot of things that one bringing meaning of course but also that make it so that you wouldn't want to go back to that person because if you're like okay well that person was happier and more successful why wouldn't you go back to the drug?00:54:42.639 --> 00:54:50.159
Why wouldn't you go back to chaos and crazy relationships and toxic men if that was more fun.00:54:50.320 --> 00:54:50.480
Yeah.00:54:50.719 --> 00:54:57.119
So you need to make your life peaceful but also more fun than it was before.00:54:57.519 --> 00:55:00.400
And fun can mean something different to you now than it did back then.00:55:00.480 --> 00:55:00.800
Yes.00:55:00.960 --> 00:55:06.639
But it needs to feel more appealing to you than the past version of you did.00:55:06.880 --> 00:55:19.679
Absolutely and like if you have yourself in a healthy place you can choose fun that is otherworldly like you can choose fun that it like I mean we're we're running a really fucking legit podcast.00:55:19.760 --> 00:55:20.880
Like this shit's really fucking cool.00:55:21.039 --> 00:55:21.760
But it's really fun.00:55:21.920 --> 00:55:22.719
It's so fun.00:55:22.880 --> 00:55:25.360
It's so much fun I I look forward to this every week.00:55:25.440 --> 00:55:26.880
Yeah like I love this shit.00:55:27.119 --> 00:55:40.639
And it's something that a past version of me could never have like deeply supported because there was too much not that there was too much instability for me to like show up for it but there was too much instability for me to be open and honest on the podcast.00:55:40.880 --> 00:55:41.199
Me too.00:55:41.360 --> 00:55:43.840
Yeah yeah yeah but and that's that's too much fear.00:55:44.000 --> 00:55:49.760
Yeah exactly and now fearlessness is like all I have inside of me.00:55:49.920 --> 00:56:10.239
Yeah yeah I love that I also I I love that we're both in this position where we are people that can be honest on a podcast my flavor of being broken is dishonesty versus chaos.00:56:10.320 --> 00:56:18.639
I've never been chaotic I've always been incredibly controlled incredibly mocky of alien of as we've talked about very mindful mindfulness has never been hard for me.00:56:18.719 --> 00:56:23.440
The DBT ski skills have never been hard for me yeah I've used them too much if anything.00:56:23.679 --> 00:56:37.920
Yeah yeah yeah so progress for me would look like falling apart progress for me would look like crying in front of you versus with other people it might be something it might be the opposite of that and that's great as well.00:56:38.400 --> 00:56:42.960
Well not great but it's not fun um but it's okay.00:56:43.119 --> 00:56:43.440
Yeah.00:56:44.079 --> 00:56:44.400
Yeah.00:56:44.639 --> 00:57:07.679
And so I was talking to a friend of mine recently and we were talking about my book and I was telling her she was telling me about certain experiences that she had that I kind of knew about but she was just expanding upon them and I told her some things that not that specifically it happened that I had done at that age and she had no idea about them.00:57:07.760 --> 00:57:41.039
I was like why wouldn't you tell me that like of all the people I wouldn't have judged you and she was kind of like who are you and I was like yeah I I didn't tell you because I was so secretive and she was my best friend in the world and I didn't tell her because I didn't tell anybody because I I really really was that secretive that keeping everything so close to the vest that self-protective so for me not being self-protective being more of like the lover girl yeah is me healing.00:57:41.119 --> 00:57:52.960
And for other people it can look the opposite it can look like being less chaotic it can mean like being more self-protective being more mindful and that's also great too it's balance that's what any of us are trying to achieve.00:57:53.199 --> 00:58:20.480
Always yeah always always always always yes absolutely and I feel like that's the thing that like is missing from the feral girl is like balance because yeah so yes so we covered some great hot girl archetypes tonight and we will this was just hot girl archetypes part two we have so many more like part 10 million yeah it's coming we have so many that we want to cover with you guys so please keep listening.00:58:20.719 --> 00:58:40.000
Yes and um that being said Emily do you have any final thoughts on hot girl archetypes for tonight I feel like we covered some really good bases tonight and the more we do these the more I'm realizing we're like a little bit of all of them.00:58:40.320 --> 00:58:46.480
And I find that that's really like it's it's low-key empowering because I know that if you and I are all of them, so are all of you.00:58:46.719 --> 00:58:47.679
Yes listening.00:58:47.920 --> 00:58:52.639
Yeah yeah like without a doubt because they are all inside of us.00:58:52.719 --> 00:59:10.000
Every single one of them is inside of us like even the like pure moments you know inside the chaotic moments and things like that like the rebel moments which we'll eventually get to rebel girl rebel girl that's I just have I have a lot of thoughts on that one.00:59:10.079 --> 00:59:30.079
I like that I like that we are all so similar we all feel really big feelings and we will all do anything possible to not feel those big feelings absolutely and we will do things like slip into archetypes as a trauma response as a coping mechanism to trauma.00:59:30.400 --> 00:59:41.199
Yeah and these things these archetypes help us survive in a lot of ways they help us fit in they help us make sense of the world and that's why none of them are good or bad.00:59:41.360 --> 00:59:41.599
Right.00:59:41.840 --> 00:59:45.199
They just are yes they just are I love that so much.00:59:45.360 --> 00:59:55.360
So they are it's it's a lot of just being right like it's a lot of just just embodying just existing just being and you flow in and out of them without even realizing it.00:59:55.440 --> 01:00:14.800
Yes all the time right we are going to be covering these for a while because there's so many I mean obviously like young had his like you know 12 but like the reality is he was not thinking about women when he was making those so probably not we are significantly more complicated with good reason thank you than men because we have a lot of shit going on all the time.01:00:14.880 --> 01:00:19.280
And so there's gonna be a lot more of our archetypes than there are of just the men.01:00:19.599 --> 01:00:19.840
Yeah.01:00:20.480 --> 01:00:37.840
Yeah also we'd be interested to hear from you guys too if there if there are any hawker archetypes that you feel like you embody very strongly that we haven't covered and you want us to dive into it and to explore the possibilities of that we would love we would love to do that.01:00:38.079 --> 01:00:49.519
Absolutely follow us on at Hot Girl Psychology if you want to get in touch it's at Hot Girls Psychology on Instagram and at Hot Girl Psychology podcast on TikTok.01:00:50.239 --> 01:01:08.079
Yeah yeah and tune in next week where we will be diving into feminine energy feminine energy yeah how how we have it what it means how we can embody it all of the good stuff.01:01:08.320 --> 01:01:20.239
Absolutely yeah all right well thank you so much for listening thank you girlies bye girl psychology
